This is an unsolicited, uninvited, awful and completely unnecessary public service rap to Rodney Smith of Watch It Played in response to a dreadfully awesome rap he posted, which was, itself, a response to an awesome rap by other fellow board game media creators The Happy Mitten Podcast.
The Happy Mitten Podcast:
Happy Mitten's awesome Dead Of Winter rap:
Rodney's nifty dandy rap in response to Happy Mitten:
A message to Rodney,
spit direct to you from me,
Chaz, of the PoDP.
Alright, here we go!
Now I was not invited
to battle, but I’d be delighted.
So don’t you feel slighted.
Let me tell you what I know.
You’re a walking rulebook encyclopedia.
More Kemet facts than Wikipedia.
Your videos, they’re always meatier.
That’s why I love your show.
Watch any game on your table.
YouTube subscription’s in my stable.
But raps? Like a Canadian Maple,
Leaf it alone.
Might get me into some water
that is boiling hotter,
but my grade school daughter,
your rhymes, she could pwn.
Now you should go and gear up,
'cause this, might make you tear up,
but, like maple syrup,
your rhymes ain’t got no flow.
No one will deny you’re a board game beast!
Instructional guru of the frozen Northeast.
The manada from Canada.
But your rappin’s got to go.
The solution? It’s a cinch.
Whether you’re spittin’ in English or French,
take your rhymes back to the bench.
Continue to hone.
Now I’ll admit this wasn’t that nice.
But the truth always comes at a price.
Cooked up tasty as fried rice
and served to you from Paradise!